Ten Little Chances to be Free (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
tenlittlebullets) wrote2004-12-23 10:24 pm
tenlittlebullets) wrote2004-12-23 10:24 pm
Phantom movie!
Okay, after a whole bunch of hassle and false starts and being promised that I could see the movie at X time only to be denied later... I give you...
First of all, I walked into the theater expecting it to suck. I was in not-exactly-full costume--cape, fedora, and Lon Chaney t-shirt, but no mask or anything--but I did rather expect it to suck, much like dressing up as Trinity for the Matrix Reloaded even though I'd read reviews and knew Reloaded sucked balls. Anyway. The overture rekindled my hopes a bit, as it was appropriately loud and blasting and reawakened some of the awestruck feeling of hearing it for the first time, but it was one of three or maybe four high points in the movie.
First of all, I have to say Emmy was not as bad as I'd expected her to be. Her voice is still annoyingly weak and it took a lot of suspension of disbelief to picture her as an up-and-coming opera star, and she is nothing like my inner conception of what Christine should look like, but she's a good actress and I'm willing to forgive her sounding, well, sixteen, due to her acting and the Amazing Heaving Cleavage. Oh yes. Low-cut dresses galore.
Gerard, on the other hand... miscast. Totally miscast. The entire basis of Erik's character, the reason why he is an antihero instead of straight-up villain going after the heroine, is because he's an underdog and you pity him and you think he was forced into his lot in life and are more ready to forgive him a murder or two. Not so with Gerard, because Gerard is hot. He's so conventionally handsome, disgustingly so, that he stops being an underdog and stops being pitiable, and starts being a total asshole. "The world showed no compassion to me"--right, so Madame Giry rescuing you from the gypsies isn't compassion? His rugged good looks, his gravelly voice... not Angel of Music material, and NOT Phantom material. I do not empathize with him at all, but usually the character is all about empathy. Instead, he comes off as a psychotic, whiny, possessive, brattish, deceptive, self-pitying asshole, made all the worse by the fact that he has less reason to pity himself.
I read Fishy's review after I got back, and I agree with what she wrote--or at least I'm pretty sure that's what she wrote--about the football jock type. It's all about the high school stereotypes, baby. In the original, Raoul is the hot, rich, too-good-to-be-true football jock boyfriend, and Erik is the dorky loner with major issues that all the cool kids avoid like the plague. In this movie, they're both football jock bastards, it's just that Erik has gotten the extreme version of a mega-zit over a quarter of his face and reacts by doing the extreme version of sequestering himself in his room and refusing to come out lest he be seen. It completely ruins the dynamic of the love triangle. The only way to explain it is Raoul's description after the scene with Mme Giry: "genius turned into madness." Madness is right--everything about Erik, from his characterization to his looks to his general personality, is completely off his rocker. You can't empathize with him and you can't pity him, so you can't like him. Oh, yeah, he has a badass vibe, but it's more of a Vin Diesel badass vibe than a Snape badass vibe. Actually, why didn't they just be open with it and cast Vin Diesel as the Phantom? He's young, he's sexy, he can probably sing better than Gerard, and they'd save time and money on the bald wigs.
Okay. Rant over, for the moment. Just a quick rundown of the scenes that stood out to me:
Title song: A biiiig round of WTF here, with a side of 'what the hell were they smoking?' and some eyesporks for dessert. So much cheese I almost went anaphylactic.
Music of the Night: Sorry Gerry, you didn't make it work. It needs to be sweet. Not rough. See rant above, and tack on a big *boggle* because--what darkness? There were enough candles and mysterious light glinting off the water to blind you.
All I Ask of You: Awww. This bloody movie was enough to make me ship R/C, because it was easily the most believable (and believably romantic) scene of the movie. I normally hate this song, but something about the acting made me go 'awwww.' This is not a good thing--it's All I Ask of You we're talking about, for Christ's sake.
AIAOY Reprise: The first part--the low-down part--was surprisingly good, and succeeded in actually making me feel sorry for Gerry for a moment. Liked the bit with the crushing up the rose. Something about the shot obscured some of his in-your-face handsomeness enough to let me make believe he was the Phantom I always knew, but then the camera moved and it sort of lost me halfway through.
Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again: It had a nice look to it, what with the snow and the cemetery, but they didn't really do anything and it sort of fell flat.
Swordfight: As the rant above indicated, put Erik and Raoul on too much of an equal 'jock' footing, and seemed kind of gratuitous. I would've enjoyed it more if it had been like on the Swedish recording and they'd been shouting at each other on testosterone overload the whole time.
Twisted Every Way: This was really Emmy's stand-out moment. There was the occasional annoying contemporary kick in her singing, but excellent acting in a scene that seems rather throwaway on the OLC but became pivotal in the movie.
Point of No Return: No comment, except that the climactic element of it is more pronounced than in the stage version. Really a turning point, although I really don't see Emmy's motivation in going off to paw at Gerry.
Final lair: Disappointingly unremarkable. Deformity? You call that a deformity? I mean, yeah, he's kinda ugly, but not enough to justify being horribly mistreated by everyone he's run into so far. Had a little dirty mind moment when Erik was tying Raoul to the portcullis (ooh... kinky!) but otherwise the general vibe is "oh noes! teh ev0l crazy d00d wants to kill mah bf!!!11one11! better do what he wants!" Also had a little tearjerked moment when she goes back to give him the ring, but only because she's such a coldhearted bitch in that scene and I'd pity anyone in that position.
In conclusion? Enough to send me running back to my stage recordings and bootlegs for comfort and never want to leave their arms again.
First of all, I walked into the theater expecting it to suck. I was in not-exactly-full costume--cape, fedora, and Lon Chaney t-shirt, but no mask or anything--but I did rather expect it to suck, much like dressing up as Trinity for the Matrix Reloaded even though I'd read reviews and knew Reloaded sucked balls. Anyway. The overture rekindled my hopes a bit, as it was appropriately loud and blasting and reawakened some of the awestruck feeling of hearing it for the first time, but it was one of three or maybe four high points in the movie.
First of all, I have to say Emmy was not as bad as I'd expected her to be. Her voice is still annoyingly weak and it took a lot of suspension of disbelief to picture her as an up-and-coming opera star, and she is nothing like my inner conception of what Christine should look like, but she's a good actress and I'm willing to forgive her sounding, well, sixteen, due to her acting and the Amazing Heaving Cleavage. Oh yes. Low-cut dresses galore.
Gerard, on the other hand... miscast. Totally miscast. The entire basis of Erik's character, the reason why he is an antihero instead of straight-up villain going after the heroine, is because he's an underdog and you pity him and you think he was forced into his lot in life and are more ready to forgive him a murder or two. Not so with Gerard, because Gerard is hot. He's so conventionally handsome, disgustingly so, that he stops being an underdog and stops being pitiable, and starts being a total asshole. "The world showed no compassion to me"--right, so Madame Giry rescuing you from the gypsies isn't compassion? His rugged good looks, his gravelly voice... not Angel of Music material, and NOT Phantom material. I do not empathize with him at all, but usually the character is all about empathy. Instead, he comes off as a psychotic, whiny, possessive, brattish, deceptive, self-pitying asshole, made all the worse by the fact that he has less reason to pity himself.
I read Fishy's review after I got back, and I agree with what she wrote--or at least I'm pretty sure that's what she wrote--about the football jock type. It's all about the high school stereotypes, baby. In the original, Raoul is the hot, rich, too-good-to-be-true football jock boyfriend, and Erik is the dorky loner with major issues that all the cool kids avoid like the plague. In this movie, they're both football jock bastards, it's just that Erik has gotten the extreme version of a mega-zit over a quarter of his face and reacts by doing the extreme version of sequestering himself in his room and refusing to come out lest he be seen. It completely ruins the dynamic of the love triangle. The only way to explain it is Raoul's description after the scene with Mme Giry: "genius turned into madness." Madness is right--everything about Erik, from his characterization to his looks to his general personality, is completely off his rocker. You can't empathize with him and you can't pity him, so you can't like him. Oh, yeah, he has a badass vibe, but it's more of a Vin Diesel badass vibe than a Snape badass vibe. Actually, why didn't they just be open with it and cast Vin Diesel as the Phantom? He's young, he's sexy, he can probably sing better than Gerard, and they'd save time and money on the bald wigs.
Okay. Rant over, for the moment. Just a quick rundown of the scenes that stood out to me:
Title song: A biiiig round of WTF here, with a side of 'what the hell were they smoking?' and some eyesporks for dessert. So much cheese I almost went anaphylactic.
Music of the Night: Sorry Gerry, you didn't make it work. It needs to be sweet. Not rough. See rant above, and tack on a big *boggle* because--what darkness? There were enough candles and mysterious light glinting off the water to blind you.
All I Ask of You: Awww. This bloody movie was enough to make me ship R/C, because it was easily the most believable (and believably romantic) scene of the movie. I normally hate this song, but something about the acting made me go 'awwww.' This is not a good thing--it's All I Ask of You we're talking about, for Christ's sake.
AIAOY Reprise: The first part--the low-down part--was surprisingly good, and succeeded in actually making me feel sorry for Gerry for a moment. Liked the bit with the crushing up the rose. Something about the shot obscured some of his in-your-face handsomeness enough to let me make believe he was the Phantom I always knew, but then the camera moved and it sort of lost me halfway through.
Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again: It had a nice look to it, what with the snow and the cemetery, but they didn't really do anything and it sort of fell flat.
Swordfight: As the rant above indicated, put Erik and Raoul on too much of an equal 'jock' footing, and seemed kind of gratuitous. I would've enjoyed it more if it had been like on the Swedish recording and they'd been shouting at each other on testosterone overload the whole time.
Twisted Every Way: This was really Emmy's stand-out moment. There was the occasional annoying contemporary kick in her singing, but excellent acting in a scene that seems rather throwaway on the OLC but became pivotal in the movie.
Point of No Return: No comment, except that the climactic element of it is more pronounced than in the stage version. Really a turning point, although I really don't see Emmy's motivation in going off to paw at Gerry.
Final lair: Disappointingly unremarkable. Deformity? You call that a deformity? I mean, yeah, he's kinda ugly, but not enough to justify being horribly mistreated by everyone he's run into so far. Had a little dirty mind moment when Erik was tying Raoul to the portcullis (ooh... kinky!) but otherwise the general vibe is "oh noes! teh ev0l crazy d00d wants to kill mah bf!!!11one11! better do what he wants!" Also had a little tearjerked moment when she goes back to give him the ring, but only because she's such a coldhearted bitch in that scene and I'd pity anyone in that position.
In conclusion? Enough to send me running back to my stage recordings and bootlegs for comfort and never want to leave their arms again.
no subject
Raoul being tied to the portcullis = me coming out of my haze and giggling insanely for about 5 minutes.
Thank you for pointing out what I hated about Gerard. I couldn't pinpoint it.
no subject
I totally agree with you about the title song being a WTF moment, as I laughed throughout the whole damned thing. That was easily the worst moment of the film. I had my hat pulled down over my eyes and my fist stuffed in my mouth.
Actually, why didn't they just be open with it and cast Vin Diesel as the Phantom? He's young, he's sexy, he can probably sing better than Gerard, and they'd save time and money on the bald wigs.
Oh my God. One of my best friends and I have this obsession with making Vin Diesel jokes - DON'T FUEL THE FIRE. Back many moons ago, we used to do all of these horrible photoshops with his face on Lord of the Rings characters .... I imagine we must have done Vin!Erik somewhere along the line. If not, then we sure are now.
I was trying to figure out why there was such an awkward moment for me during the final (originally wrote that as 'ginal') lair scene - it was the part where Erik's standing by tied up Raoul, and they're both singing at her. And then it just hit me how completely silly and teh gayz!11! it was. This movie sometimes gave Alexander a run for its money in sheer homoerotica (that sword fight was ridiculously phallic) .... not that it's a bad thing, my evil little Erik/Raoul slasher side was so pleased .... but at the same time .... yeaaaah. ::giggle::
All I Ask of You was probably the highlight. Those kisses were 'teh cute' and actually believable. Yeah, I really was caring more about Raoul at this point ... take that as you will, but I've always liked Raoul .... just not to the point as I did last night. I was actually just like 'Oh, Erik, stop being such a fuck and let him go!"
And I'm kind of pleased with Emmy. Yeah, her voice is weak in parts, but I thought her acting was good ... and she was hot. Man. I had the biggest pervert smile on my face hen her skirt flew up after PONR. I won't lie.
I know people who weren't phans who were utterly pleased with it .... so at least they were satisfied. Hmmm.
no subject
Chaaaah! Lil' Madame Giry was adorable, and Miranda Richardson Madame Giry made me fall into OldLady!lust. So hot.
The one thing that kind of amused me about Emmy's performance was the Amazing Heaving Cleavage. Because if you breathe like that (so that your cleavage heaves), you can't get a strong enough breath to sing. *is such a choir nerd*