tenlittlebullets | (no subject)

The Astounding Saga of the Cheap Pop-Tart knockoffs, AKA why people with deadly allergies should read ingredient lists even on stuff that's usually safe:

Narrator: In A.D. 2006, dinner was beginning...
Brain: What happen?!
Body: Somebody set up us the itchy throat.
Eyes: We get ingredient list.
Brain: What!
Eyes: Read main box.
Brain: It's you!!
Ingredient list: How are you gentlemen!!
Ingredient list: All your gratuitous milk protein are belong to us.
Ingredient list: You are on the way to anaphylaxis.
Brain: What you say!!
Ingredient list: You have no chance to survive use your epinephrine auto-injector.
Ingredient list: Ha ha ha ha...

Don't fret, I'm fine at the moment. All your tolerance to small quantities of allergen are belong to me, so all I have to deal with at the moment are rather swollen lips and throat. If it gets worse I'll go crazy with the Epi-pen and antihistamines, but right now I'm just sort of "Urgh, how annoying." I doubt it will get worse though--it feels much less serious than the Peanut Challenge Disaster, which you should ask me about sometime if you're feeling masochistic. And it was quite a tiny amount of whey anyway.

[ETA: I almost forgot to post this: Guess what arrived in the mail yesterday.]