Miss Fantine had a lover (or, I have completely gone 'round the bend)

[tenlittlebullets]

The very day after I discovered "Miss Lucy Had Some Leeches," somebody posted a summary of Les Mis in clapping-game format to fanfiction.net, and it seemed kind of pointless because what's the fun of Miss Lucy if there are no averted swearwords? And then the rhymes started bouncing around in my head. I'm still not sure there's a point (which is why I'm inflicting it on you, dear f-list, instead of posting it in the wild), but my inner six-year-old is amused.

MISS FANTINE HAD A LOVER
A cautionary tale for young ladies at risk of going astray

Air: "Miss Lucy Had a Steamboat"

Miss Fantine had a lover
The lover was well-bred
Miss Fantine was a fallen girl
Because she was un-

Whether it was boredom
Or simply awful luck
Miss Fantine's lover left her
Once he'd used her for a

Fumbling for a living
She bids Paris farewell
And leaves Cosette with innkeepers
Who put the kid through

Helpless as Cosette is
They use her as a slave
And then extort her mother
Till they send her to her

Gravely sinful slatterns
Must soon be shown the door
Miss Fantine can't find any work
So she becomes a

Horseplay's largely harmless
A snowball down the back
Even if you're consumptive
Is no cause for an at-

Tackle this loose woman
And slam her cell door shut
A bourgeois was just assaulted
By a filthy gutter

Slums are bad for illness
And cold adds to the threat
Fantine dies in the hospital
Without seeing Cosette

They took her to the churchyard
Her headstone had no mark
They put her in the common pit
To rot there in the

D-A-R-K
DARK

Comments

[lokogato.livejournal.com]

This is exceedingly awesome. 8Db *adding to memories*

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

Oooh, I thought you'd left the Les Mis fandom. I'm flattered you liked it enough to poke your head back in. :D

[evewithanapple.livejournal.com]

Genius! Clearly I need to gather some Mizzie friends to play this with.

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

Awww, thanks!

I am not responsible for any strange looks or visits from the men in the white coats you might get when actually singing this. *g*

[kittycallum.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha ... you're either a genius or the best kind of crazy! I must now find some Mizzies and play this -- or just sing it to myself till I drive everyone nuts.

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

or just sing it to myself till I drive everyone nuts.

Or until they all think you're nuts.

[kittycallum.livejournal.com]

Oh, but they already do. So a bit more oddness from me won't make much difference. :D

[shenth.livejournal.com]

I won't propose marriage, but it's a near thing. Love the swearing aversions!

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

Haha thanks! The aversions were lots of fun to write.

[mmebahorel.livejournal.com]

Damn, you had to get that in my head, didn't you?

You are awesome :)

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry!

...no, I'm not, it's been stuck in my head too and I had to share the pain. *g*

Thanks. :)

[nightangelca.livejournal.com]

Applause!

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

Thank you! *takes a bow*

[sophiedegrouchy.livejournal.com]

ILU. That will be all.

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

♥

[lesmisloony.livejournal.com]

Incredible. Um... just using this icon because it's almost relevant.

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

>____> I see your possibly-relevant icon and reply with one of my own.

[toi-marguerite.livejournal.com]

BWAHAHAHA!

[ulkis.livejournal.com]

That was clever and cute, you know, cute in the morbid way. (Although I can't figure out the last word in the first verse. Undead? Unbed? UnI'm missing something obvious aren't I?)

[prouvairesylvie.livejournal.com]

Unwed? :)

[ulkis.livejournal.com]

Ah, at least I knew it was super-obvious? :)

[larkacharka.livejournal.com]

This is brilliant! I really hope my friend agrees to play this game with me in the near future.