Miss Fantine had a lover (or, I have completely gone 'round the bend)

[tenlittlebullets]

The very day after I discovered "Miss Lucy Had Some Leeches," somebody posted a summary of Les Mis in clapping-game format to fanfiction.net, and it seemed kind of pointless because what's the fun of Miss Lucy if there are no averted swearwords? And then the rhymes started bouncing around in my head. I'm still not sure there's a point (which is why I'm inflicting it on you, dear f-list, instead of posting it in the wild), but my inner six-year-old is amused.

MISS FANTINE HAD A LOVER
A cautionary tale for young ladies at risk of going astray

Air: "Miss Lucy Had a Steamboat"

Miss Fantine had a lover
The lover was well-bred
Miss Fantine was a fallen girl
Because she was un-

Whether it was boredom
Or simply awful luck
Miss Fantine's lover left her
Once he'd used her for a

Fumbling for a living
She bids Paris farewell
And leaves Cosette with innkeepers
Who put the kid through

Helpless as Cosette is
They use her as a slave
And then extort her mother
Till they send her to her

Gravely sinful slatterns
Must soon be shown the door
Miss Fantine can't find any work
So she becomes a

Horseplay's largely harmless
A snowball down the back
Even if you're consumptive
Is no cause for an at-

Tackle this loose woman
And slam her cell door shut
A bourgeois was just assaulted
By a filthy gutter

Slums are bad for illness
And cold adds to the threat
Fantine dies in the hospital
Without seeing Cosette

They took her to the churchyard
Her headstone had no mark
They put her in the common pit
To rot there in the

D-A-R-K
DARK

Comments

[mmebahorel.livejournal.com]

Damn, you had to get that in my head, didn't you?

You are awesome :)

[10littlebullets.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry!

...no, I'm not, it's been stuck in my head too and I had to share the pain. *g*

Thanks. :)